In fierce authenticity. I share my abuse story.
In my life to date I’ve had some body aches, heart aches, loss and trauma. 3 concussions 🤕 A broken tooth. A miscarriage and medical trauma revolving around this. Ongoing verbal and emotional abuse from a partner with addiction. Choked and chased in this moment of rage. Supporting and advocating for support from the police officers pinning him to the ground for him 20 minutes following this exact attack.
Using my tools to regulate my breath rate and heart rate enough to have a deep conversation with the kind officer about my fears of what may happen that evening with his attempts to fight the cops. Panicking, feeling like the “battered wife” of looks from those observers passing. To then just over 2 months later being called in as medical decision maker on a jolting morning in May, he was ICU sedated and intubated. The person that I loved tried to take my air away, now needing air. The person that I loved, killed someone in a drunk driving car accident. The person that I loved is now in prison. 😢
Although the last 4 years of my life have been filled with heartache, loss, high stress and severe anxiety….I stand here today on my final step of having a front tooth cap with my tooth implant process and finally getting my “smile” back. In a real and metaphorical way. I stand in power of decisions that I have made to move out of a victim mentality and into a survivor mentality, standing in power that I will NOT allow myself to be placed into a state of extreme vulnerability where my air may be taken from another soul. I stand for the fight I had within and the strength I found that night in March. To fight back and use my defensive reflexes to get out of a choke hold of someone I loved pinning me to our truck. The same truck that 2 months later took Mr. Linden’s life. 💔
With this massive grief and guilt, I stand up for myself in solidarity. I stand for those that have shared their stories and those who may share in the future. Please know that you are not alone. Please know that there are tools that can support profound shifts in mentality, mindset, body awareness, healing and regulation of the nervous system. 🌟#stillhere #abusesurvivor #thepasemethod #traumainformed
Bethany Michelle
